The Mysterious Stranger

by MC Breath

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about

Welcome to The Mysterious Stranger!!

The album took over a year to write and record in my smelly bedroom from roughly October 31, 2011 to December 31, 2012 while my kid was asleep.

Thanks to all the amazing musicians I borrowed small portions of their music from in order to compile my ridiculous songs.

Hope you enjoy it!

credits

released January 5, 2013

Written & Recorded by MC Breath
using Ableton Live, Audio Hijack Pro, Sound Studio, and a Shure SM58.

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about

MC Breath Providence, Rhode Island

MC Breath is a rapper & producer dude from Providence, Rhode Island making nifty bass-laden musical beats and kooky, clever, wicked retahhded, irreverent rhymes since 1999.

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Track Name: Bouillabaisse
I’d like to tell you all about a little fish stew
your grandmother may or may have not made for you
Is it hella good? Holy cow, honey, hell yes
a delight to digest, it’s Bouillabaisse!!

a Provencal stew from the city Marsielle
in gay Paris you may see it as the “soup of the day”
once a fisherman’s stew made of the morning’s catch
down the hatch goes a batch of a broth made from scratch

Use a fair amount of fish, be it salmon or sole
be sure to serve the fish and broth in separately bowls
that’s the Marsielle way, baby, better get in a boat
better catch fish and make a dish soothing to the throat

Don’t quote me on this, but this dish may consist
of more fish than fish filmed in the film The Abyss
fuck this, need a break, too hungry, can’t take it
but first I'll finish up the verse and tell you how to make it

First find yourself a fairly large pot
then you add a bunch of water and the fish you caught
like Baryshnikov, you should dance around the kitchen
just be careful ‘round the burners I don’t wanna hear your bitchin

and it’s certainly bewitching boiling up a stock
add onions, olive oil, and be sure that it’s chock
full of fishbones, you’ll jonze while the soups cookin
give the fishheads a kiss, tell ‘em “hey good lookin’”

Now add your herbs; basil and orange peel
bet your butt you add halibut before you add eel
Like Shaquile O’neil this meal’s a slam dunk
puts hair on your chest and maybe junk in your trunk

add a chunk of monkfish for an English twist
it's a dish that is too darn delish to resist
I insist you respond my simple request
be my guest and ingest a bowl of my Bouilabaisse!!!
Track Name: The Shining
Jack Torrence gets a job that he thinks looks pretty swell
it’s as the Winter caretaker for the Overlook Hotel
The manager tells Jack the last caretaker killed his wife
and his two daughters with an axe before he took his own life

Jack isn’t superstitious so he doesn’t give a shit just
packs his things and takes his kin up to the snowy Rocky Mountains
The hotel is built above an Indian Burial ground
Not necessarily the type of place you’d want to be snowbound

Jack’s wife Wendy is quite friendly and supports Jack at first
Unaware of the hotel’s curse and Jack’s forthcoming blood thirst
Their son Danny has ESP and a friend inside his face
named Tony who tells Danny stay far the fuck away from that place

But Jack thinks it will be a good place to work on his writing
Then Danny starts having mostly frightening ghostly sightings
of the two creepy daughters that were murdered long ago
the elevator opens and the blood doth flow

The Overlook has a cook named Dick who acts downright daffy
when he asks Danny if he’d like ice cream using telepathy
Dick delivers the message with impeccable timing
But Danny is a bit disturbed Dick discovers his Shining

He then tells Danny the Overlook itself had a shine
but if he stays away from Room 237 then he’ll be fine
But Danny doesn’t listen and on his Big Wheels he cruises
past the open door, goes inside, and comes out covered in bruises

so Jack goes to the room to find out who attacked his son
out from the tub walks a naked woman and they starts touching tongues
then he looks in the mirror as they’re just about the shag
sees the naked woman turn into a decomposing old hag

Then Jack runs to the bar and meets the ghost bartender Lloyd
and tells him how lately Wendy’s been making him tense and annoyed
then in the john Jack meets the ex caretaker Delbert Grady
who tells him that he must “correct” his son and his old lady

Danny begins to sense the danger that is to come
and he gets into a trance and then he chants “RED RUM”
Then Wendy starts to feel like Jack's become a real killjoy
when she stumbles upon “all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy”

written over and over again from Jack’s typewriter
Jack catches Wendy and gets angry then he tries to fight her
But Wendy swings a baseball bat and Jack falls down the stairs
Then drags his body to the pantry, locks the door, and says her prayers

She runs to the two way radio and discovers it’s destroyed
While that schizoid Jack gets annoyed back at the pantry getting toyed
by Delbert Grady once again who then unlocks the pantry door
and with a hankering for gore, Jack goes off to settle the score

To escape Danny jumps from the bathroom window to the ground
But Wendy’s trapped and with an ax Jack attempts to chop the door down
Then he decides to go and chase Danny through the hedge maze instead
but he catch catch him and collapses in the snow and now he’s dead

or is he?
Track Name: Superbar
Back in the late 80's Dave Thomas told us Wendy's
had "the best burgers in the biz" but that wasn't enough
apparently he felt that we should have more of a plentiful selection
of exotic ethnic dishes for us to stuff
into our mouths
not talkin' Houses of Pancake mistakes
not talkin' handfuls of fries at Five Guys 'til we get the shakes
I'm talkin' W-E-N-D-Y apostrophe S
I'm talkin' Superbar Buffet, ho-may, "best in the business"
I'm talkin'
UGH
stuff my stomach 'til it practically pops
I'm talkin'
UGH
refill my tray all day 'til they call the cops
to kick me out
thinkin' about taking your family out?
The Superbar's by far the best bargain in town, no doubt, so...

Welcome to McDonald's may I take your order?
No you may not and I ain't runnin' for no border
YOU can have it your way right away
but I'll take the Wendy's Superbar Buffet

After I pay for my Wendy's Superbar Buffet I yell "HIP HIP HOORAY!" when they hand me my tray.
I pile my plate high with everything great my insatiable appetite's bout to be satisfied.
I can't wait to eat my plate of pasta prima vera
that's noodles with salad bar veggies mixed with marinara
I'll have pizza with premade dough and rotini alfredo
such authentic cuisines seems like we're back in Palermo
garlic bread's bellissimo, can't just have-a one piece, no
only thing missing from this meal is a Cianti vino
you know what I mean, though, Superbar's not just green veggies for salad
it's a valid buff, a hungry man's dream, so...

Welcome to McDonald's may I take your order?
No you may not and I ain't runnin' for no border
YOU can have it your way right away
but I'll take the Wendy's Superbar Buffet

Over your good clothes is where a smock goes
when you eat the tacos not much of a shock those
refried bean burritos are filled with grilled meat
bros and sisters you'll get blisters from the heat of the nachos
then I chose a Mello Yello drink from the well, yo
now untuck your shirt, time for dessert, not just talkin' Jello
I'm talkin' chocolate pudding!
I wish that I could bring the Superbar back home with me, gee, that would be a good thing.

Welcome to McDonald's may I take your order?
No you may not and I ain't runnin' for no border
YOU can have it your way right away
but I'll take the Wendy's Superbar Buffet
Track Name: Job Interview
Please, Tell me a bit about yourself, if you will?
Have no experience or willingness to work or any skill

Where do you see yourself in five years?
cold, broke, hungry, alone with no career

Can you tell me why are you leaving your present position?
Can you tell me what the hell this is the fucking inquisition?

Can you describe a time when your work was criticized?
When I stole so many office supplies a company had to downsize

Tell me something about your last job that you really loathed?
Having to show up on time, well-behaved, shaved, bathed and clothed

What was the last project you headed up, and what was its outcome?
talking the platinum blonde buxom temp into a threesome

What can you do for us that would outshine the other candidates
I’ll supply the office parties with the finest dankest cannibas

Tell me why are you interested in working for our company?
I’d rather have a cancerous inopperable malignant lump in me

During the interview had no clue what was going through my brain for every question given I was livin' on another plane see pre-interview made the snafu of knocking back a few too many cans of carbonated radioactive yellow goo!!

Had too much Mountain Dew before my job interview
knew I was screwed when I had to spew half way through

What would be your ideal work environment?
40 hours spent consuming numerous intoxicants

Have you been on a team where somebody was not pulling their weight?
Typically I am that somebody so, yes, I can relate

Do you think big picture or are you more detail oriented?
I think like Richard Farley but just a hair more demented

On the job what motivates you to do your very best?
Motivation breeds success but for me just leads to stress

Can you give an example of your proudest achievement
Lying that my wife died to take time off for bereavement

How would our team benefit from your knowledge and expertise?

(ugh) Listen, Big Cheese, tell the other interviewees
who think that they are the bee’s knees,
with their liberal arts degrees
that you sent the job overseas or that there’s a hiring freeze
suggest they call temp agencies
can’t you see I’m down on my knees
make me one of your employees
hear my pleas and hire me, please!!!!!

During the interview had no clue what was going through my brain for every question given I was livin' on another plane see pre-interview made the snafu of knocking back a few too many cans of carbonated radioactive yellow goo!!

Had too much Mountain Dew before my job interview
knew I was screwed when I had to spew half way through
Track Name: Crazy Motherfuckers
crazy motherfuckers listening to seal
crazy motherfuckers watching ally mcbeal
crazy motherfuckers on deal a meal
crazy motherfuckers like ron popiel

crazy motherfuckers on a crazy train
crazy motherfuckers like herman cain
crazy motherfuckers leaving cake in the rain
crazy motherfuckers eating shrimp chow mein

crazy motherfuckers with a piece of flare
crazy motherfuckers in the naughty chair
crazy motherfuckers playing dragon’s lair
crazy motherfuckers watching double dare

crazy motherfuckers drooling on their bibs
crazy motherfuckers crawling in their cribs
crazy motherfuckers filling out mad libs
crazy motherfuckers munching on mc ribs

crazy motherfuckers in al capones vaults
crazy motherfuckers like eric stoltz
crazy motherfuckers high on bath salts
crazy motherfuckers drinking chocolate malts

crazy motherfuckers like Mr. Spock
crazy motherfuckers like Willie Talk
crazy motherfuckers who shot Tupac
crazy motherfuckers watching Hudson Hawk

crazy motherfuckers eating cornbeef hash
crazy motherfuckers like like Clinger from MASH
crazy motherfuckers like the Evil Dead’s Ash
crazy motherfuckers with a milk mustache

crazy motherfuckers wearing Umbros
crazy motherfuckers broke Geraldo’s nose
crazy motherfuckers shopping at Lowes
cause the mom n pop hardware stores all closed

crazy motherfuckers celebrating lent
crazy motherfuckers like 50 cent
crazy motherfuckers in the musical Rent
crazy motherfuckers with a trouser tent

crazy motherfuckers snacking on S’mores
crazy motherfuckers watching Star Wars
crazy motherfuckers on the Welsh moors
crazy motherfuckers leading Duck Tours

crazy motherfuckers sipping Perrier
crazy motherfuckers selling Mary Kay
crazy motherfuckers at the Cirque de Soliel
crazy motherfuckers with a purple toupee

crazy motherfuckers with a Netflix queue
crazy motherfuckers streaming Teen Wolf Too
crazy motherfuckers like Gerard Depardieu
crazy motherfuckers just like you!
Track Name: Nude Beach
My girlfriend Jude said “dude, I can’t take it anymore
can’t spend another gorgeous day indoors, let’s go to the shore.
so bring your bathers, bag of bagels, and a beach ball, too
for me and you are headed to the beautiful briny blue

We packed up the car and headed far to the seaside
a gorgeous day to catch some rays beside the ocean tide
lathered sun screen, explored marine life and was feelin’ alright
but by the dock, we stood in shock from such a disturbing sight

We had no clue the beach we went to was clothing optional
some weirdo with a wiener like a frozen popsickle
came up to Jude and said “you’d better shed all your layers”
I said, “the only way you’re getting Jude nude is if you pay her.”

as he was reaching in his fanny pack for a buck to pay
up walked some fruit wearing the suit he got on his birthday
he said “without a doubt you both stand out much like two sore thumbs
and I guarantee you’ll feel more free once you bare your bums.”

We had to clue we were going to a nude beach
saw a dude’s pubes and huge droopy boobies
the whole crew knew we were two prude noobies
We had no clue we were going to a nude beach

I said “I am sorry, sir, but we prefer wearing our pride
and our dignity, for I can see, should not be denied
we have a lot of shame, we shall remain completely concealed
we’re not misfits so our naughty bits will not be revealed

we have self respect so we reject your nudist lifestyle
your love of nudity, to jude and me, is vulgar and vile
you hippie pervs get on our nerves flaunting your plump naked rumps
we’re completely sketched, before we wretch we’re leaving this dump”

The fruit looked at me so full of glee after my lament
I was a bit bemused and quite confused by his amusement
as I looked to my dear it became clear what fruit found absurd
my lovely Jude, no longer prude, stark naked as a jaybird

I said “Hon’, what have you done? I am stunned and speechless
I’m so embarrassed you undressed and exposed your bare breasts
Jude said “ I felt at home so when in Rome do what Romans do”
I said, “if Romans were roamin’ off a cliff would you roam too?”

We had to clue we were going to a nude beach
saw a dude’s pubes and huge droopy boobies
the whole crew knew we were two prude noobies
We had no clue we were going to a nude beach

some freak who used to streak in 1976
told us he loves the beach for all the peachy bottomed hot chicks
said “are you blind, cause I can’t find a broad under 58
only hairy beasts ready to feast with their apelike dates

only moocows with uni-brows, monstrous misshapen mutants
whose BO releases Ozone depleting poluntants
bulbous breasts I wouldn’t touch ‘less I had on rubber gloves
unique races born with faces only mothers can love

Jude said “I’ve had enough, you think you’re tough but you’re just uptight
I won’t let you offend my brand new friends, this calls for a fight
there’s nothing wrong with naked dongs flapping around in the breeze
there’s nothing fina than exposed vagina by the palm trees

therefore I’m leaving you, I’ll rendezvous with my new friend “freak”
his name is Harry and we’ll marry later on in the week
you had your chance to drop your pants and let your balls breath the air
instead you chose to keep your clothes on like a self righteous square

We had to clue we were going to a nude beach
saw a dude’s pubes and huge droopy boobies
the whole crew knew we were two prude noobies
We had no clue we were going to a nude beach
Track Name: Bed Bugs
My girlfriend Jude dumped me and moved out why I’m not sure
she took the dog, the goddamn dishes and all the furniture
now I’m sittin’ in the kitchen without a pot to piss in
thinkin’ about Jude’s vagina, only thing that I’m missin’

I’m also missin’ money since Jude was the bread winner
I’ve been relying on ramen noodles every night for dinner
not one good meal since our domestic problems were first arising
been so long that each day the dog food’s looking more appetizing

I’ve been sleeping on the hard wood floor instead of a bed
Using an old sweatshirt rolled up as a pillow for my head
been Laying out yesterday’s newspaper sections as bed sheets
Thinking “where will I find a bed for free?” the answer: the streets

On garbage day I went up and down every last alleyway
looking for any mattress not stained and rotting with decay
finally found one, dragged it home to once again feel well-rested
how I was I to know this slightly worn mattress was infested ….with

Bed Bugs! Bed Bugs!
There'll be no sleep today!

Was not aware of the severity of the situation
until I woke up to find prominent skin manifestations
itchy blisters from my whiskers down to my tippy-toes
what I did to deserve this discomfort god only knows

bloodsucking freaks between the sheets from that old mattress I found
Should have kept that cursid unkempt cushion there on the ground
I ignored the stain from some strange undetectable source
my act of “urban forage” has become “recycler’s remorse”

I regret the day I liberated this begrimed bed
I was desperate for a place to rest my slumbersome head
got a dreadful bed infested with nests of mites instead
I won’t rest until these festering bed bugs are all dead

I’ll need germ warfare to displace these distasteful invaders
but there is no way that I can pay for exterminators
I got no dough to control this parasitic fiasco
so look out below I’m launching this mattress out the window

Bed Bugs! Bed Bugs!
There'll be no sleep today!

Now I’m back to my uncomfortable sleep accommodations
I’m so paranoid of parasitic re-infestation
i would rather fall asleep and get hacked to bits by Freddy
so i’m tossing Diatomaceous Earth around like confetti

It’s so depressing to be right back in the rut where I started
After Jude gave me major tude and left me l broken hearted
Feeling lonely in the kitchen, looking back reminiscing
It’s actually not Jude I long for it’s the bugs that I’m missing

besides the health hazards those bug bastards kept me company
when I was lonely they were snug as bugs in a rug with me
unlike women I could depend on them always being ‘round
despite the bites those loyal mites had never once let me down

Went on a mission for a mattress that’s completely unclean
to find the most obscenely squalid mattress I’d ever seen
found a particularly putrid one, took it to the crib
waited for the bugs to come crawling back, but they never did

Bed Bugs! Bed Bugs!
There'll be no sleep today!
Track Name: Lottery
My girlfriend Jude left me without a dollar to my name
She left me without anything except disappointment and pain
As I walk down the street contemplating my pathetic existence
a lottery ticket blew in my direction from a distance

and I watched in awe as the ticket fell right before my feet
picked up the ticket and continued my lonely stroll down the street
walked into a nearby bar and a lady on the tv screen
was calling out the number printed on my ticket, then I screamed

Holy Shit! I won the fucking Lottery!

the bartender handed me a stiff drink to calm me down
holding my ticket tight ordered every one at the bar a round
around this time I started spacing out, the drunks looked at me funny
as I began fantasizing about how I’ll spend the money

Thought of things I can afford now that I am no longer poor
such as actual name-brand items at the high end health food store
I can pay off my credit card, my car, and crippling student loan
live in a castle with a throne and an alpaca of my own

Holy Shit! I won the fucking Lottery!

then I suddenly began feeling absolutely guilty
thinking about starving children living in total poverty
thinking about the war torn homes of the world’s poorest familes
thinking about people living on the streets dying of disease

as I expressed my guilt to anyone who’d listen at the bar
on the tv was a commercial for a chic luxury car
which reminded me my ticket and my miraculous win
I paid the tab, and left the bar, and rushed to cash that fucker in

Holy Shit! I won the fucking Lottery!
Track Name: Jesus
Long ago some now-deceased priests published a thesis
about a gentile Jewish genius named Jesus
The story starts with Mary of Galilee who is a virgin
but little does she know a baby soon will be emergin’
from her lady bits, “Maybe it’s immaculate conception!”
Joseph said with dread as he said goodbye to his erection
for eternity, nativity, that’s Jesus’ birth
a day that should be celebrated with merriment and mirth
but no room at the inn, in Mary’s womb - future king
of the Jews, he pursues the profession of a tekton
that’s Greek for “carpenter”, just in case you that weren’t sure
and at 12 he said “bon jour” to his folks and went on tour
at 30 he met John the Baptist who exclaimed, “holy crap this
is not another facade this here is the Son Of God!”
Jesus said, “I’d love to stay but I’m afraid I’ve set my sights
on the Judean to fast for 40 days and 40 nights.”

Jesus is just alright with me
Jesus is just alright oh yeah

In the desert while Jesus was deep in meditation
the Devil went down to Judean to give him three temptations
Jesus didn’t buy his bullshit told the Devil to flea
then he returned to Galilee to start up his ministry
he started showing off the many tricks of the divine
when at a wedding turned some water into wondrous wine
then people started really following him around
after he healed some lepers and said something profound
then on the Sermon on the Mount he taught the people to love
and preached about the kingdom of the Big Homie from above
the Pharisees accused him of having Satanic powers
when in reality more like a hippie handing out flowers
there was concern but Jesus reassured that he’d be okay
promised if he was killed he’d rise from the dead on the third day
one week later on a mountain his face began to shine
Elijah and Moses declared him officially divine

Jesus is just alright with me
Jesus is just alright oh yeah

On a donkey Jesus rode into Jerusalem
the Pharisees were certainly not happy to see him
they decided to arrest him and throw his ass in jail
then his disciple Judas committed an epic FAIL
for 30 pieces of gold, Judas sold Jesus out
loyalty’s what he did not seem to give two shits about
then at dinner told his disciples he was basically screwed
turned his blood into a beverage and his body into food
then they went into the Garden of Gethsemane to pray
but then soldiers showed up and took our hero away
to the high priest, who was a beast, beat Jesus’ hide
and Judas couldn’t take the heat and committed suicide
Jesus was dragged to the Roman governor Pontius Pilate
who condemned him to death, his maker soon to be met
crown of thorns, speared side, nailed cross, crucified
but joke’s on them he rose from death a few days after he died

Jesus is just alright with me
Jesus is just alright oh yeah

Jesus, he's my friend
(Thank you for being a friend)
Jesus, he's my friend
(You're a friend of mine)

OH YEAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!